What is the actual task distribtuion at home? Do you recognize your mental load? 

consciously reflect why tasks are distributed like this (role models, learnt behaviors from parents? core beliefs?) and whether this reflects what you want. (e.g. I am always cooking but I hate cooking). How would you like it? What is your ideal task distribution? 

create awareness and understanding and a commitment to further steps (e.g. in a joint session) 

difference between tasks and domains, agreeing on a distribution of the domains, speaking clearly about what these responsibilities entail, standards you would expect from each other and full ownership of the respective domain

Defining as a couple what you can let go of, where „standards“ are not yet defined well, what feels good, what does not 

Habits and Sustainability –  learn how habits work and how you can make the learnings and agreements stick for more than a couple of weeks. 

congratulate yourself for making a step towards a life you truly want